Children of all ages encounter anxiety and fear in various forms: The following are some guidelines that may prove helpful in discussing frightening times with your child.
During fearful times, keep these tips in mind:
Listen to your child and look for subtle indications of fear
Keep in mind that not all kids verbalize their fear, act out, or have nightmares - the child you know well may be suffering silently.
Realize and deal with your own fears as a parent .
Children can sense your fear; and it will spill over onto them. Surrendering our children to Allaah in prayer is a step that says He is Sufficient even for our most precious gifts, our children. The Prophet (salallahu alayhi wa sallam) used to seek Refuge with Allaah for AI-Hasan and A1- Husain and say:
"Your forefather (i.e. Abraham) used to seek Refuge with Allaah for Isma'eel and Is'haq by reciting the following: "U'eedhukuma bikalimaati'llaahit- taammah min kulli Shaytaani wa haammah wa min kulli aynin laommon" (I seek Refuge for you both with the Perfect Words of Allaah from every devil and from poisonous pests and from every evil, harmful, envious eye.' " (Bukhari)
Limit media exposure
No one needs graphic pictures of disaster replaying over and over in his mind, especially not a child. During fearful times, keep these tips in mind: Encourage children to memorise adhkar There are simple adhkar (words of remembrance) to be said at the time of fear and anxiety. It will perfectly be nice to ensure that the children commit them to memory very early. Begin with the mu'awidhaat I.e. soorah al- Ikhlaas, soorah al-Falaq and soorah an-Nas. Followed by specific words of protection recommended by the Prophet (salallahu alayhi wa sallam). It might be a very good idea to buy them a small book of duaa from the sunnah like the Citadel of the Believers and make them consult it often for their prayer needs.
Don't forget the Recitation of the Qur'an
Aside from the message which .the Qur'an imparts, reciting or listening to recitation of the Qur'an relaxes the mind and reminds kids of our All Powerful God. Once you have identified your child's fears, and your own, put them under the microscope and see how Allaah is Akbar (Greater) in comparison! Follow These Famous Fear- Fighters We will further realise how greater Allaah is above and over all our problems when we learn what He did for those who stood firm and stout against their fear in the Qur'an. One of the greatest ways you can help your children conquer their fear is to read to them from the words of Allaah. The Qur'an is full of stories of people who faced their fears with the help of Allaah. Here are examples of those who relied on Allaah and got over their fears even in the scariest circumstances .
Prophet Ibrahim (alayhi salaam): His faith in Allaah brought miraculous protection from the big fire in which he was thrown and from which no one gave him any hope of survival.
"They said: "Burn him and help your aliha (gods), if you will be doing." We (Allah) said: "0 fire! Be you coolness and safety for Ibrahim (Abraham)!" And they wanted to harm him, but We made them the worst losers. And We rescued him and Lut (Lot) to the land which We have blessed for the 'Alamin (mankind and jinns)." (Q21 [Anbiya]:68-71)
Musa (alayhi salaam) and the children of Israel: Musa's faith in A1laahsaved him and the children of Israel from the grip of Fir'aun. Allaah made a way out for them through the sea when all means of escape was all lost and their enemies were completely routed. Allaah says:
"And (remember) when We delivered you from Fir'aun's (Pharaoh) people, who were afflicting you with a horrible torment, killing your sons and sparing your women, and therein was a mighty trial from your Lord. And (remember) when We separated the sea for you and saved you and drowned Fir'aun's (Pharaoh) people while you were looking (at them, when the sea-water covered them)!' (Q2[Baqarah]:49-50)
Prophet Dawud (alayhi salaam): He was only a boy but he knew with the help of Allaah, he could slay the giant, Jalut (Goliath). What kind of match was Dawud for the army of Jalut? Allaah records the story in Surah al-Baqarah:
"How often a small group overcame a mighty host by Allaah's Leave?" And Allaah is with As-Sabirin (the patient ones, etc.). And when they advanced to meet jalut (Goliath) and his forces, they invoked: ''Our Lord! Pour forth on us patience and make us victorious over the disbelieving people." So they routed them by Allah's Leave and Dawud (David) killed jalut (Goliath)!' (Q2[Baqarah1:250- 251)
Allaah who helped these righteous people against what they feared is able, and can help you against your own fears if you ask Him to. Allaah says:
"And when My slaves ask you (0 Muhammad SAW) concerning Me, then (answer them), I am indeed near (to them by My Knowledge). I respond to the invocations of the supplicant when he calls on Me (without any mediator or intercessor). So let them obey Me and believe in Me, so that they may be led aright." (Q2 [Baqarah]: I 86)
This article was culled from the publications of Deen Communication Limited