The Glorious Quran emphasizes showing respect to both parents in many places. In Surah Israa verses 23 and 24 Allaah says: "And your Lord has decreed that you worship none but him. And that you be dutiful to your parents. If one of them or both of them attain old age in your life, and say not to them a word of disrespect, nor shout at them but address them in terms of honour. And lower unto them the wing of humility through mercy, and say: My Lord! Bestow on them your Mercy as they bring meup when I was young. "
Also in Surah al-Baqarah, verse 83,Allaah says; "And [remember] when we took a covenant from the children of Israel, [saying]: worship none but Allaah [alone} and be dutiful to your parents, and to kindred, and to orphans and al-Masaakin [the poor] and speak good to people and perform As- Salat, and give Zakat. Then you slid back except a few of you, while you are backsliders." Also, the Prophet [peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him] said, "He is not from us the one who does not have mercy on our young, and the one who does not respect our elders" [AbU Dawuud).
In another narration, Abdullah ibn Amr ibn al-As The Prophet(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: Those who do not show mercy to our young ones and do not realize the right of our elders are not from us. [Abu Dawuud] Importance of this concept Children need to see respect demonstrated to parents and others elders in their everyday lives, but the society that we live in nowadays makes it very difficult for children to pick up this quality. This society reflects self-centeredness where each person is only concerned with he wants without considering anyone else.
That is why it is important for parents to work hard to make sure the child understands what is respectful and what is not. if the child is left alone without parents guidance in this area, he will grow up to be rude and disrespectful. It is also important to instil this concept in your teen so that he knows how to get his rights in a respectful way through convincing others rather than fighting or shouting. This will help him respect the rights of others. Home life becomes much simpler and enjoyable when everybody respect towards others. A respectful home will help greatly in creating the pleasant, positive, and healthy atmosphere necessary for the success of the training process for teens. They will be more receptive to their parents guidance and they will more likely accept it than reject it if they feel respected.
How to instil this in teens This can be easily done in many ways: always treat each other with respect so the child has a real life example. Treat the child in respectful a way, and consistently instruct, train and demand your child to do respectful things. For example, tell him to say" please" and "thank you" whenever he is asking for so doing or something is given to them. Even a situation so simple as thanking his mother for the food at the dinner table will give him an idea of how much his parents do for them. Even when disagreeing, the children should be taught to do it with respect.
For instance, say the parents take the children to the park to play. When it is time to go, the children ask, "Can we stay longer?" After parents explain that it is time to go, the children insist that they still want to play. They begin to say, "It is not fair. Why do we have to go?" Parents should not tolerate this attitude. If the children see that this disrespectful attitude is accepted, they will continue to behave in this manner. It is all right to let the children ask politely to stay longer, but they should remember to say please and to know where the limit is and when to stop asking .
This article was culled from the publications of Deen Communication Limited