From the most important reasons for marriage is that mankind should have legitimate means to satisfy their natural appetite for sex. Infact, more than food and water, the great desire for intimate relations with spouses and its cover story actual fulfillment has had great impacts in the sustainability of marriages. This problem is only successfully dealt with when the spouses do not deny partners these relations and then, participate in it with every involvement and strong positive emotions. The Prophet (salallahual ayhiwa sallam) said:
"When a man invites his wife for his sexual craving, she should respond even if she is on (i.e. engaged with) her oven." (Nasaaee).
And Allaah says:
"And they (women) have rights (over their husbands) similar (to those of their husbands) over them to what is reasonable." (Q2 [Baqarah]:228).
Shaykhul-Islaam ath-Thaanee Ibn Qayyim al-Jawziyyah (RAH) gave some details of the benefits of intimate relations, he said:
"In it is the perfection of pleasure and complete kindness to the beloved, the attainment of the reward therein, elation for the soul, putting her off her negative thoughts, relaxing the spirit and driving off her anxiety and overwork. It relaxes the body, regulates the mind frame, brings about wellness and pleasure is not completed until every part of the body feels its portion of sensual gratification.
So, the coolness of the eyes is its glance at the beloved, the ear its hearing him, the nostrils its sensing his fragrance, the mouth its kissing him, and the hand its fondling him. When any of that is missing, the soul continues to search for it and it will not know peace and calm (until it is achieved) and for that, the woman is called sakan (a place of repose) for the soul’s repose (in her).” (Raodat ul-Muhibbeen).
Speak well to your spouse
the Prophet (salallahualayhiwa sallam) said:
''Anyone who conceals the faults of a Muslim, Allaah will conceal his faults in this world and the Hereafter." (Muslim).
A wise man once said:
'Express admiration regarding the excellent traits in your wife and you'll get better her inadequacies because she loves your encomia in everything.'
The matter is that spouses should learn to see good things in their partners and should mention it to them and not become malicious at the other's deficiencies.
This article was culled from the publications of Deen Communication Limited